Kids on the Internet?? Question for parents...

[Sgroi135]

Question for parents out there.

How many of you guys have kids say in the age range of 11-16 and they have their own computer in their room? Or can access the Internet whenever they want?

Are any parents monitoring their children at all.

I know what I do. My kids are young yet, but when they get older I WILL be monitoring what they do. Yes, I will spy on my kids! But who said it is not allowed.

Are any parents out there doing anything to control their kids access to the Internet?

[Arubalisa]

Originally Posted by Sgroi135

How many of you guys have kids say in the age range of 11-16 and they have their own computer in their room?

Yes, an old desk top which is NOT connected to the internet and thus is a dust collector and rarely if ever turned on .

Or can access the Internet whenever they want?

No, access is a privledge and not a "right" in our home. It is a reward for good behavior and something earned.

Are any parents monitoring their children at all.

ALWAYS. Even with monitoring after use, the history is always checked. There are way too many temptations out there for our children.

Are any parents out there doing anything to control their kids access to the Internet?

Computer use, even for school work or projects is only allowed under adult supervision and on the family room laptop. NOT the office p.c. which is a little more secluded. All three family computers are password protected and cannot be used without an adult loggin on.

[cindyo]

I will answer your question as a parent of 16 & 18 yr olds...both are required to have computers for school, laptops were given as graduation gifts from the 8th grade. Needed for high school. Work is done in school and comes home to be continued on their jump drive thingies.
They have access to facebook, myspace, etc and we "verbally" monitor their travels on sites. It is difficult, and I think you just get to the point where you have to trust them. They go to private schools and are basic good kids. I guess you have to know your kid. Both are high honor students here.
Could they pull the wool over our eyes,,,,yes...

[Sgroi135]

I am in the line of work where I see some horrendous things.

I agree with trying to trust your kids. But there are people out there that are very good in convincing kids.

I will be installing monitoring software on their computers.

I have spoken to some people who think it is not a big deal to just let their kids go online without any supervision.

The parent should know every person on the child's buddy lists. If they can't tell you who they are, how they know them, and where they live, then they shouldn't be one the list.

I like to use the internet in an anology with your house. At night you close and lock all the windows and the doors. You don't just let anyone in your house. They have to ring the bell to attempt to get access.

The Internet is even worse! Cause there are Millions of people out there that can have access to your kids through the net. And most parents do not know how to "lock the door".

Most kids these days can run circles around their parents with computers. That is what makes me nervous. What I see online, is not good. I cannot discuss it here, but PM me if you want more information!

[Andrea J.]

my son, now age 23 was under "parental controls" on AOL when we first ogt internet in 1997 til he was a jr in high school.

then, as a jr he had to go on to other sites that the AOL disallowed.

we trusted him.

he was and is more computer savvy than paul and i...........so he could have pulled the wool over our eyes.

we did limit his internet use when he was in elementary school and middle school and it was a privilege and not a right. we also had 2 little name plates that said "academic incentive" one tag was on the computer monitor and the other was a small brass tag on his horse's saddle.
andrea

[arubamark]

That's going to be a tough one but I agree with the entire trust thing. Lets's face it we were all young and did some things we were not supposed to one time or another. You can monitor internet activity yes, but is that going to stop any temptation or curiousity?

My point is to educate and talk to them and have a close relationship. Although my children are only 3 and six they still know to use the computer and it is something that we talk about. Children that are older have friends and lets face it, not all parents are going to be monitoring internet use so if they want to explore there is always a way.

[Sgroi135]

Originally Posted by arubamark

That's going to be a tough one but I agree with the entire trust thing. Lets's face it we were all young and did some things we were not supposed to one time or another. You can monitor internet activity yes, but is that going to stop any temptation or curiousity?

My point is to educate and talk to them and have a close relationship. Although my children are only 3 and six they still know to use the computer and it is something that we talk about. Children that are older have friends and lets face it, not all parents are going to be monitoring internet use so if they want to explore there is always a way.

I agree Mark,
My kids are 4 and 6 and they can use the computer very well. Both can log in, and open websites and navigate like its no ones business. I will educate them on the Internet when the time comes, but I will still most likely install some sort of monitoring software.

For example, kids are kids.....
We find, that when a kid has ONE myspace/facebook page, then they have like 4. One for their parents and one for their friends. One for the pics they can put online, and the ones that kids SHOULD NOT PUT ONLINE.

The same comes with instant messaging screen names like on AOL or Yahoo or MSN. If they have one they have 5.

There is so much chat lingo that the kids use it is ridiculous, they have almost another language they speak online.

Even educating the kids online..... Kids are still going to experiment. And that kid they meet on Myspace or AOL that says that they are the same age and have the same interests as the child (because the kid tells their life story on Myspace page), will really turn out to be some pedophile.

Just have to make sure that we protect our kids, and in my situation I am protecting my kids and your kids.

I will "spy" on my kids when the time comes, that is part of life for them. They will not know that I am doing it. I will only step in, if there is something that needs to be done.

[Andrea J.]

DH reminded me of the time our son age 14 or thereabouts was doing a report on the hindenberg.
we had to release the aol parental controls so he would be able to surf the net and find info and photos as he needed.

well, he was on the pc which we had in the dining room also know as the homework room. i went i to see how he was comi8ng along and he was looking at PORN trash. the DOPE that he was or thought that i was, he reached his hand up to cover the screen of the monitor. ya right, like i was blind.
he was punished....severely lost his online privileges and had to do much penance for us.

in hindsight why did he just not pull the plug or turn off monitor when he heard me opening the pocket door to come in?

i remember the first time we did go online in 1996 or 7, the first thing my not unline girlfriends wanted to see was online dirty pictures. of course i obliged and we were all SHOCKED, literally. OMgosh we were all in our 40s, all married and all of us had never even imagined such filth.
to this day, i can vividly remember the pix scary.

our kids learn too much crap, too young.
when our son was in 4th grade we had to explain to him about "i did not have sex with that woman, ms lewisky" .
he asked, we told.

disgusting stuff surrounds us.
our kids are our most precious resources and it is our duty to protect and do well for them.

back to mucking a stall
andrea

[Sgroi135]

Andrea,

What you saw back in the 90's is nothing.

I will bet my entire life that what is available now is more disturbing and disgusting than you can even dream about.

[peter carri]

It would be much better if the kids' computer is not placed inside their room. That way, parents can still monitor them without being so obvious. Parents can also make use of some monitoring software to filter their computer from unwanted sites.