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Old 08-23-2008, 04:31 PM
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The problem with this forum

Back from Aruba...yes, the "dissapointed" guy...

the following are comments i've made regarding this forum. i feel it deserves to be read by all - thus, i've decided to create a separate thread for the discussion. this discussion below stemmed from the post that followed after someone stated their negative views of aruba.

please click on the link and read the entire thread.

excerpts from my posts:

no need to take offense at my using the term "gangs up" - i didnt mean it in a derogatory way. it was used to describe what everyone was seemingly doing to this poor person who posted the initial thread. i think it was safe to assume what he meant by grittiness - that the downtown area was rundown. everyone could've left it at that and informed him that the other areas are better. there was no need to be pinning him to the corner with such negative vibe by listing a litany of suggestive comments. the same was done to him before with his initial post - which was subsequently closed.

take it as it is and let people say what they feel. in the end this forum is a free flowing blog. no need to second guess or question a person's post. and if you have to ask then ensure that tone of your message is neutral.


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it is too much to ask when asked in an augmentative and intimidating manner. perhaps i'm reading too much into it, but my impression was such. the same also happened to me with one of my first post on this forum - it dealt with me saying that one would regret taking AA due to the long lines. right off the bat - the demanding questions for justification came my way.

in the long run - who would want to question the forum? and if no one is willing to present opposing views, what's the point of this forum???? - to say the same thing and have everyone be in unison?

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the problem here is not that the posts are rude or demeaning. it's the tone - thus, i guess it can be said that everyone is abiding by the forum's rules as we're not outright disparaging each other. however, the issue is the manner in which people respond to the dissenting views on this forum. the atmosphere is quite negative, accusatory, and discouraging in regards to posting different views. many people believe that they're being civil in how they respond to such comments when in fact they're tacitly bullying and suppressing the individual via the tone of their message.

notice how the person who originally posted this thread never wrote back?

my goal here is not to stir controversy but to tell everyone to chill out and let people speak their minds without having to take a defensive position.
arubaness is offline  
Old 08-23-2008, 05:16 PM
Aruba since 1979
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since the poster ARUBANESS is not asking for advice or information i am closing this thread. not deleting it, just locking ot so that folks may read and follow the link if they so chose.andrea
Quote:
Originally Posted by arubaness View Post
Back from Aruba...yes, the "dissapointed" guy...

the following are comments i've made regarding this forum. i feel it deserves to be read by all - thus, i've decided to create a separate thread for the discussion. this discussion below stemmed from the post that followed after someone stated their negative views of aruba.

please click on the link and read the entire thread.

excerpts from my posts:

no need to take offense at my using the term "gangs up" - i didnt mean it in a derogatory way. it was used to describe what everyone was seemingly doing to this poor person who posted the initial thread. i think it was safe to assume what he meant by grittiness - that the downtown area was rundown. everyone could've left it at that and informed him that the other areas are better. there was no need to be pinning him to the corner with such negative vibe by listing a litany of suggestive comments. the same was done to him before with his initial post - which was subsequently closed.

take it as it is and let people say what they feel. in the end this forum is a free flowing blog. no need to second guess or question a person's post. and if you have to ask then ensure that tone of your message is neutral.


-----
it is too much to ask when asked in an augmentative and intimidating manner. perhaps i'm reading too much into it, but my impression was such. the same also happened to me with one of my first post on this forum - it dealt with me saying that one would regret taking AA due to the long lines. right off the bat - the demanding questions for justification came my way.

in the long run - who would want to question the forum? and if no one is willing to present opposing views, what's the point of this forum???? - to say the same thing and have everyone be in unison?

-----
the problem here is not that the posts are rude or demeaning. it's the tone - thus, i guess it can be said that everyone is abiding by the forum's rules as we're not outright disparaging each other. however, the issue is the manner in which people respond to the dissenting views on this forum. the atmosphere is quite negative, accusatory, and discouraging in regards to posting different views. many people believe that they're being civil in how they respond to such comments when in fact they're tacitly bullying and suppressing the individual via the tone of their message.

notice how the person who originally posted this thread never wrote back?

my goal here is not to stir controversy but to tell everyone to chill out and let people speak their minds without having to take a defensive position.

Andrea J. is offline  
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